Saturday, March 8, 2014

The Relationship Timeline

"The prince charming always varies, but the plot line is ever familiar: the leap, the high, the crash."

I took this from Candy magazine (Feb 2014 issue) and thought I should share it. It's quite accurate, well in my opinion though. As much as we try to deny it, the truth is that life has a grand way of recycling themes again and again. Why should love be any different? I'm not being bitter or what.. just keep on reading. :D

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STAGE 1: THE FALL
This stage is absolute cotton-candy bliss. Every first comes into play and is documented carefully in the drawer where you keep your fondest memories: the first love letter, the first date, the first time he holds your hand, the first argument, the first "i love you", the first kiss.

This stage is what fuels the fools in love. This is the stage that brings the butterflies back even after the relationship is long over. The first time you fall in love, this is the stage that makes the jump worth it.

STAGE 2: THE STEADY HIGH
This is where you find yourself after a few months into the relationship. You know enough to expect a text in the morning (and one at night), what to say to pacify his jealousy, and how to make him feel like the best boyfriend ever.

Sure, you fight sometimes. But any negative emotion is eclipsed by the fact that you've created traditions together, that you happily exist within the familiarity of someone you can assuredly call yours.

It's the stage where you feel free to be vulnerable to share secrets, to be the best and worst version of yourself because you've found someone who seems as caught up in you as you are in them. It feels safe. It feels loving. Most of all, it feels real.

STAGE 3: THE DROP
At this point the relationship is starting to plateau. The texts, though still sweet, are expected. The conversations seem to revolve around the same things. Even the words that once made your heart dance, I love you, sound commonplace. But you're in love and you still want to be.

He isn't doing anything wrong, but all of the fire that he started out with has died down to a bare minimum. There is life getting in the middle and though once upon a time it would've been such a big deal, now you don't mind all that much.

The sensation that things aren't as safe as they used to be, that things are uncertain, even finite. But you hold on. You hold on because there is no better option.

STAGE 4: THE STUBBORN HOPE
You get upset with him because his trying isn't enough; you get upset with yourself because you think you're failing him. Things are hitting a fast decline, but you refuse to let go.

You believe that you both just haven't figured out the secret to bringing it back to how things were. But you will. Or, at least, you believe you will.

STAGE 5: THE END
Maybe he ended it. Maybe you did. Maybe you both agreed that it was time. Maybe another party strangled itself around your relationship, choking the life out of it. Whatever the reason, it's over.

You miss him. You love him. You never missed him or loved him more than you do now, now that he's gone. But you remember the breakup. It's over and you are waiting for your heart to catch up to your head. So you close your eyes and cry some more.

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Relationships don't all look the same. They don't all stop at Stage 5. Sometimes they go back to stage 1. Sometimes they stay in stage 2. But many times, they go through the cycle of breathing and dying, much like the human heart.


What are your thoughts? :)

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